Superheroes in Disguise
Success, Glory, Heartbreak, and Hurdles: All in the Eyes of Parents
Bright lights are centered on a girl flashing a large and proud smile while a gold medal gets placed around her neck. All the blood, sweat, and tears made everything of this moment worth it. The roar of the crowd crescendos and eyes pan over to two figures that are embracing one another beaming with joy and overflowing with happiness. These two humans go by none other than, mom and dad. Though the athlete reached her goal by making sacrifices, overcoming obstacles, and putting in the work, her parents had a large contribution to all her big and small victories. As parents of athletes, you learn that you have to make sacrifices of your own, defeat challenges, be a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear, and much more. They are in it as much, in some occasions more, as the athletes. This is a behind-the-scenes look at parents of athletes who compete at the college level.
John and Chris Abbott, parents of six children, have gone through years of driving their kids back and forth to practice, traveling to competitions, staying overnight in hotels, and being the biggest support system for their athletes. Their youngest two, Tess and Tate, dedicated their lives to their sports and in return received athletic scholarships. Tess, a Junior at Western Michigan, earned a spot on the WMU Varsity Gymnastics team. Tate, a freshman, took her swimming talents to Lees McCrae College. When asked if they ever envisioned this for their daughters Chris said, “I never could have imagined this from when they started their sports as little kids. It’s incredible to look back and see that everything they did-we did and got to where they are today.”
Growing up, John was a huge sports fan and athlete himself. In high school he played football, basketball, and baseball. He continued his love for sports in college and joined the URI intramural basketball and softball league. “I remember the fun and excitement that I had competing in athletics while a student and feel that similar enjoyment watching my children compete and having success.” The four older siblings participated in club sports as well, but it never got to as serious of a competition level as Tess and Tate. Coming from a huge sports fan family, you can imagine things get very competitive. “In everything we do, the kids (and John) make it a competition,” Chris commented, “Family games nights are extremely loud and intense.”
Though Tess and Tate’s journey to college sports seemed all bright and smooth sailing, there were a lot of personal struggles they faced. In gymnastics, the recruiting process typically starts around 8th grade. The summer going into freshman year of high school Tess committed to Iowa State University. Between her freshman and senior year, she proved to be “college” material and kept up with her gym and schoolwork. April of her senior year she was planned to sign her NLI (National Letter of Intent). That day she received a call from the head coach saying he couldn’t offer her that spot and that she no longer had her scholarship. In that moment Chris and John were absolutely furious. When asking questions about this situation John had a lot to say. “I couldn’t believe it. How can a coach make a promise and until that day tell us that she (Tess) didn’t need to worry about her promised spot on the team?” Chris added, “We did not apply to any other colleges because there was no reason to up until that moment. I was so full of emotion, but I couldn’t imagine what Tess was feeling.” Tess took a month off to regroup and take a break mentally and physically. During that time, she lost hope, but since Tess still wanted to compete, her parents had faith and reached out to other colleges that had gymnastics programs. It late May when her current coach, Penny Jernigan, agreed to have Tess and come take a look at Western Michigan’s campus and athletics. Shortly after her visit to Western Michigan she was offered a full ride scholarship to come join the team. “It was such a God thing, we weren’t expecting an offer so soon,” Chris exclaimed. After several nights of thinking on it, Tess and her parents agreed to take on this once in a lifetime opportunity.
“It may be cliché, but I believe everything truly happens for a reason.” — John
Tate, a now soon-to-be sophomore, had different challenges she faced in her swimming career. She was an incredibly talented swimmer and extremely bright student. Though she did exceptionally well in school, she always mentioned not wanting to go to college. Her parents, understanding the importance of a college education, urged her to at least apply. It wasn’t until her senior year in high school that there was a realization that she could go to college for swimming. “Tate is so gifted, athletically and academically , but she lacks confidence and believing in herself,” Chris noted. Her father, John, took the initiative and contacted some college coaches just to see where things went. Before he knew it, swarms of coaches were inviting Tate to come visit their institutions. After visiting with a handful of coaches, Tate seemed to warm up to the idea of attending college, not just for academics, but also for swimming. As spring of her senior year crept up, John guided her as she started applying to schools with and without swim teams. She had narrowed her list down to 3 colleges. During her high school state swim meet, she was approached by the coach from Barton College with a last minute offer. In February, Tate received a call from the swim coach at Lees McCrae saying he would love for her to become a Bobcat. She stayed in touch often with the coach but never imagined she would get any financial rewards for sports. “I think I was more excited for Tate than she was,” Chris giggled. After a couple nights and looking at all her options, Tate called the coach back and said she was ready to be Bobcat. When asking how the parents felt through this process John said, “Honestly, we couldn’t be prouder of Tate, she worked very hard and was so deserving, and we hoped this would make her realize how good she really is.
As Tess and Tate continue their student-athlete journey, their parents remain being their #1 supporters. Asking how the college experience was for them as parents, they mentioned it is very different but just as stressful.
“We are always wanting the best for our daughters. This year we had to watch them on TV. No matter how long they compete I will be nervous watching them. It’s so hard to watch when it does not go as well as hoped knowing they practiced so hard.” — Chris
Being parents to athletes is an underrated task. John and Chris took on such a difficult yet such a rewarding role as their daughters go out and compete, knowing in some way they wouldn’t be where they are without them.
